My Second Baby Has Arrived!

The day has finally arrived. I took this picture of my tummy before I went KKH to deliver my baby on Thursday at 6+am. My cervix was 3cm dilated, and my gynaecologist decided to break my waterbag. I had my epidural at about 8+am when my contractions became really unbearable. My cervix was fully dilated at about 12pm but because my baby was not in the ideal position for birth (he's facing up though head was down), the midwives put me in various positions to push the baby out while they used their hands to turn the head of the baby. It was quite tedious because I had to go through this procedure for about two hours and my epidural medicine finished at 12+pm. The midwives convinced me not to top up the medicine because I suffered quite bad side effects from epidural (e.g., vomitting, shivering) and told me that baby would be out soon. The effects wore off at about 2pm and I had a hard time managing the pain till the baby decided to come out at about 2:30pm when the gynaecologist made her way to see me. KengYong was very supportive throughout the whole process; he even "pushed" the baby out with me by timing his own breathing to coincide with mine. I also had to thank Rina, my younger sister, who took leave to help me mind Gregory while I was in the hospital. I could see that Gregory had a great time with her and Regine.

When the baby was out, KengYong and I were so amazed that he looked so so much like Gregory. See pictures below (Left: Baby. Right: Gregory at birth). Baby was 3.455kg and 52cm long. He was a lovely baby, just like Gregory two years ago. I was discharged from KKH on Friday, a day after I have given birth. I was relieved that Baby didn't have jaundice on the first day, which Greg had gone through. Both boys look so much like KengYong, and they have the same blood group as their Daddy (A+) too.

Greg's First Pet

Greg's teacher used to have a small fish tank in school and he was quite disappointed to find it gone after the school had a mini renovation mid this year. Yesterday evening we walked past an aquarium, and Greg loved watching the little fishes swimming in the tank. He was so excited when I told him that I have decided to get him a little fish tank so that he could rear some fish himself. The shop owner was quite kind to do up Greg's little aquarium and selected a type of fish that's easy to rear. All in all (including the fish food and a net), the shop owner charged me $10. I thought that was quite cheap!

Greg has all sorts of questions about his fishes... e.g.,
Greg: Mummy, why my fish never sleep?
Me: Fishes do sleep. It's just that they do not close their eyes when they are asleep.
Greg: But I never see my fish sleep...
Me: Your fishes maybe sleeping if they are not swimming about but their eyes would still be opened..
Greg: Yesterday I see them swim, now I see them swim... I don't think my fish sleep you know..
Me: Well, maybe they slept at the same time as you last night.. hahaha.

He's also very enthusiastic about feeding his fishes besides admiring them from outside the tank. He fed the fish once in the morning and half an hour later, he came running into my room with the bottle of fish food.
Greg: Mummy, mummy, I think my fish is hungry. Can I feed them?
Me: You just fed them not too long ago..
Greg: But I want to feed them.
Me: Remember the fish auntie said you cannot feed the fish so many times?? Only once a day..
Greg: Why?
Me: The fish will die if you feed them with too much food.
Greg: But the fish don't want to eat if they are not hungry..
Me: Nope Greggie. I said no means no. You are overfeeding your fish.
Greg: Why?
Me: (getting impatient) Your fish will die..
Greg: I want my fish to die..
Me: What? You want your fish to die?Why?
Greg: Mummy, can you get me new fish if my fish die?
Me: Nope. Now go keep the fish food or I am going to get really angry.
Sigh..maybe he's still too young to feel responsible for the fish.. I wonder if it's the right thing for me to get him the fishes now..

A 'Not-So-Negative' Poem to Share

I am working today. I took MRT to CKTang during lunch to see if I could get Greg some formal clothes (because he has at least two wedding dinners to attend in December). On my way back to office, there was this pair of mother-son sitting diagonally opposite me in the train. Son was trying to concentrate on his handheld game whereas the Mother was teasing and distracting him. Son asked his mother to stop but she didn't. Son got quite angry and shouted at his mother when he lost his game. I guess the Mother must have felt a loss of face and she started whacking the boy from MRT and all the way to Square Two (they alighted at the same stop as I). I pitied the boy, really. Just thought that he didn't deserve so much repeated "physical humiliation" in public by his mother. Sigh... I thought the Mother was also naive and childish. She should have stopped making fun of her son once she knew she was irritating him. I believe I would never do such a thing to my kids... aiyo... or is it too early to say?... hahaha..

I am generally slowing myself down. Mood swings I still have but I guess the next poem that I would like to share isn't too negative.. haha. Here it is..

Do what makes you happy

So that your life doesn't feel empty

Be with who makes you smile

It helps to forget problems and make them seem so mild.

Laugh as much as you can

Remember that life can be shorter than counting from one to ten

Learn to cherish what you have

Love as much, as if you do not have much time left.

"I Don't Want To Go Back To School"

Originally, KengYong and I planned to send Greg back to his childcare today but apparently the hfmd outbreak at his childcare centre has not been cleared. Greg has stopped going to school since last Tuesday and I noticed that he's getting too comfortable at home. He's now quite resistant to the idea of returning to school, his reason being "my house is nice and fun". We have received phone calls from the school today and yesterday that there are still children getting hfmd, so I guess we have to keep Greg at home for the next few days.

Anyway, today, Greg's form teacher T. Roze called. Greg, thinking that it was his daddy, ran to pick up the phone while I was preparing his lunch. I saw him keeping very quiet when he picked up the phone and I took the phone away from him. It was then that I realized his teacher called to give an update of the hfmd situation at childcare. Greg appeared very anxious after I put down the phone and kept asking why his teacher called.

Greg: Mummy, why Teacher Roze called me?

Me: What did teacher roze say to you?

Greg: I don't know. But why mummy? Why t roze called? T Roze wants me to go school?

Me: (laugh) You think so?

Greg: (nod his head) ...but I don't want to go to school.

Oh no! I seriously think that I would have a big problem sending him back to childcare when the place is cleared.

Saachi's mummy (Saachi is one of Greg's childcare mates) shared with me her way of getting Saachi motivated to return to school after a week of their overseas vacation. I decided to try her method on Greg.

Me: Greggie, remember just now T. Roze called? She said she misses you and she cried. She wanted to see you.

Greg: T. Roze cried?

Me: Ya. How about you going back to school to "sayang" her?

Greg: But I don't want to go back to school... (paused for a while) I think T. Roze'd better come to my house Mummy.

Me: ???

Sigh... this plan doesn't work... I guess I have to think of other ways now..

Still Waiting..

Greg dozed off at home yesterday at about 2pm and it was raining cats and dogs. I decided to go for my gynae appointment at 2+pm without him. I did tell Greg in the morning that I would be going to see doctor and he could follow me if he's not napping. Anyway, I instructed Yanti to give me a ring when Greg woke up, and hurriedly I dashed off to KKH. Had my CTG done and my contractions were found to be erratic still. Gynae did a vaginal examination and my cervix has only dilated 1.5cm. Aiyo, 0.5cm more from last week. The progress seemed extremely slow. When I returned home, Greg had woken up already and was playing the Lego blocks with Yanti.

Greg: Mummy, you saw doctor at the hospital already?

Me: Yup. Why?

Greg: The doctor never take didi out yet? (To mentally prepare Greg, I told him a few days ago that I have to go hospital one day to "take didi out" and I have to stay in the hospital for a few days).

Me: No. Didi doesn't want to come out yet.

Greg: Why? The doctor is naughty?

Me: Har? Doctor naughty? What do you mean?

Greg: If doctor gives didi a sweet, didi may want to come out you know...

Me: (laughed out loud) Greggie, I don't think didi knows how to eat sweet yet.

Greg: Ohhh... how about I ask didi to come out?

Me: ok... you can try...

Greg: (with his eye brows knitted and arms crossed, looking at my tummy) Didi, you better come out fast!

Me: Why you talk so angrily to didi?

Greg: Oooh... (bent forward to talk to my tummy softly)... didi, can you please come out? I have sweet for you.

Me: Haha.. why do you want didi to come out now?

Greg: I want to hold didi's hand you know.. very nice one.

Well, I am sharing this conversation between Greg and I with you because I thought he's an amazingly sweet boy. =) Hope he and his didi will get along fine in future.

I had some blood discharge in evening yesterday and some cramps. They went off in the night and all was well till this morning when I started bleeding again. I am really unsure if they are caused by the gynae examination or it's the "show". Anyway, I guess I have to keep monitoring the symptoms... I am just concerned about rushing to the hospital too late and had to give birth to the baby in the car/ cab, and worse...at the void deck! Aiyo...or maybe I am thinking too much already... *keeping my fingers crossed and hoping all goes well*

I Am Still Around!

Ooooh... I am getting somewhat anxious. Friends and relatives kept sms-ing me if I have given birth. My contractions are still irregular, and the baby has not shown any signs in wanting to face the world yet.I am getting nervy about it because the baby is growing bigger, and I am indeed concerned that he may be too big for me to push out if he drags any longer.Of course, I do experience a lot of back aches, heartburn and making frequent trips to the restroom. Sigh sigh sigh.. my tummy does seem to have been over-stretched and I am simply exhausted.

Well, I keep telling self to enjoy my pregnancy and to appreciate that the baby is still swimming happily inside me. I believe I am going to miss him inside me when he's out. In addition, I think my hands are going to be very full and I would have another set of challenging issues to manage when he's out. Just hope that he's going to be a healthy little boy and that he gets along well with everyone in the family, especially Gregory. I am keeping my fingers crossed that everything is going to be fine.

1cm Dilated Already!

I went for my gynae check on Monday when I was coming to 9.5months into pregnancy and Gynae said my cervix has dilated 1cm already! I was shocked and I thought this was fast. It took me three days to dilate that 1cm upon induction when I had Greg. Well, people always say that the subsequent pregnancies are always different from the first one and my muscles must have been a lot more laxed now after Greg wormed his way out in February 2005.

I had quite bad contractions on Monday evening, and I was so worried that I might pop any time. KengYong left on a business trip on Monday night so I sms-ed Rina to "stand-by" for a couple of days to help me with care of Greg if I pop. I also took a couple of days of MC to monitor my contractions and rest. Interestingly, my contractions have somewhat ceased.. perhaps it's because I laid in bed as much as I could. Well, I am glad that KengYong is back now and I am also back at work today. I hope to walk more so that my cervix dilates faster. However, many medical colleagues were shocked to see that I was back at work today because they felt that my tummy could "explode" anytime. My back sure aches more and baby seems very active moving around when I am at work.

It was kind of KengYong to take leave to spend sometime with Greg today. We couldn't bring Greg in to the childcare today because apparently there was a small outbreak of tummy flu and hand foot mouth disease at his school. Sigh. He was with me at home when I was on MC for the past two days. Greg cannot afford to be sick at this time just in case I go into labour, and KengYong may have a hard time managing us both. I guess I may have to take MC for tomorrow again so that I can keep Greg at home. How nice if my mum and dad are around.. life would certainly be a lot easier for me if they are present. *SAD*

Thanks to those who have sms-ed/ called me thinking that I could have popped... I would certainly keep you posted once baby is out!

Sentosa On Sunday

Greg had been pestering us to bring him to Sentosa. KengYong and I were wondering how he came to know about this place, as we have not talked about it, and the last time we took him there via cable car was when he was about 1 year+. Anyway, we promised to bring him to Sentosa on Sunday morning if the weather was good. Greg was happy admiring the environment around when he was in the cable car, but I think he's a little scared because he kept asking KengYong to hold him. After the cable car ride, we drove in to Sentosa because Greg wanted to play sand on the beach. We went to Siloso Beach and on our way to the beach, he spotted the place where he could play Luge. He insisted that he wanted to play Luge with KengYong after his sand play.

Greg's height was measured at the Luge station where KengYong purchased the tickets, and was re-measured again before he and KengYong took the "sky-bench" up. Apparently, the minimum height for the kids to play was 90cm if accompanied by adults and luckily, Greg's height is slightly above 90cm (sigh! He didn't grow much!). Actually, I was quite worried about him taking the "sky-bench" up because the staff said they could not do much if Greg decided not to sit on it half way through. Anyway, I guess I was overly worried for nothing. Greg seemed brave enough to take it, and he nodded his head when I asked him if he really wanted to do it just before he hopped onto the "sky-bench". Well, he appeared thrilled to be able to take Luge with KengYong when I received them at the end point and Greg had wanted to go another time!
Greg: Mummy, you go up with me can?
Me: No. Mummy can't.
Greg: Why? Your tummy too big?
Me: Yes. Mummy has didi inside. Not safe for Mummy to play the Luge. Next time ok? When Didi comes out, Mummy takes the Luge with you.
Greg: Why Didi so long still doesn't wanna come out??? *pulling a long face*

Anyway, just before he napped at home, he asked if his cousins (Edwin, Roy, Xian, Regine and Reuben) can go Sentosa and take Luge with him the next time.. hmmm.. I guess I should organize one family gathering at Sentosa when Edwin returns from his China exchange programme trip. It should be fun! =)

Greg's First Few Proper Drawings

Instead of doodling on paper, I noticed that Greg's drawings have become more purposeful over the past couple of weeks. Since he was one, he started drawing lines from circles to form balloons, and drawing lines to match shapes. Of late, he requested that I showed him how to do proper drawing. I have drawn him pictures of man (e.g., stick figures), house, sun, dog, fish and tree in simplified form. Interestingly, I noticed that he has made some attempts to draw them on his own. Picture on the left: He asked if he could draw me just now. He asked me to sit still while he was trying to "sketch" me. It was quite a good attempt though he didn't draw me any legs/ mouth/ nose! Afterall, this is his first drawing of a stick figure and I thought he drew "me" pretty well! Picture on the right: His first tree drawn.



KengYong and I are left-handers. Strangely, Greg isn't. Well, Greg certainly makes a better artist than KengYong and I, doesn't he?

O'Kids Spot on Saturday Morning

After the fun we had at Delta Sports Complex on the Thursday that passed, Rina and I decided to meet at O'Kids Spot at Orchid Country Club on Saturday morning. It's another indoor playground - it's scale is bigger than the one at Atlantis but smaller than Gogobambini. As usual, I missed out the fun.. I could only be the photographer while the rest had fun climbing here and sliding there. Both Rina and KengYong still prefer the indoor playground at Gogobambini to the one at O'Kids Spot. KengYong found the tunnels in the latter too small and frustrating for an adult to crawl whereas Rina felt that the playground at Gogobambini has more cushion and is safer. Greg had some bruises after playing at O'Kids Spot (e.g., on the right side of his face, knees and elbows). Aiyo... doubt we would go O'Kids Spot again. However, I think little Regine has a different verdict from the rest; Though she's so young and small, she's always so adventurous to climb, crawl and slide, even at great heights. She's often spotted running about in the playground with a wide smile on her face! =)

A Fun Deepavali Morning

Rina and I had originally arranged to visit the Zoo on Deepavali morning but it rained. So we decided to explore the new SOL playground cafe at Turf City. It was such a big disappointment. It did have an indoor play area and an outdoor playground. Unfortunately, the playground outside was wet and the toys in the play area were either lousy or were out of order. Besides, the staff took a long time to serve us our drinks and I thought their food isn't cheap. At first we thought of moving on to Gogobambini but we had been there too many times and I believed it's going to be very crowded on a public holiday. Anyway, our final decision is to bring Regine and Greg to Atlantis at Delta Sports Complex. It's Greg's second time visiting the Atlantis. Greg had a great time playing there, because Rina and Regine joined in the fun. It's always more fun and merrier when there are more people you know play with you. Too bad I could not join in... *sobsob*

Teacher's Birthday

Teacher Roze's birthday falls on 13 Nov. However, she would be not around at school from Deepavali till end of next week. Teacher Roze is one devoted teacher at learning vision and I know she usually puts in her very best in her work role. Greg is fortunate to have her as his form teacher and I can see that all the kids in her class love her a lot. Anyway, Susanna (another mummy) and I decided to spring her a little birthday surprise yesterday morning because that's the only day this week that she started work at 7am. Got her a slice of chocolate cake from CHOCZ because Sue said Teacher Roze loves chocolate. Greg and I met Edna (Greg's classmate) and Sue at 7:45am outside the childcare centre. We stuck the candle in the little cake and got Greg and Edna to bring it to Teacher Roze. I guess it's still too early in the morning, and everyone looked as though they have just woken up. KengYong was the photographer and aiyoooo... he only managed to take one shot! Well, he said everything happened too quickly and he didn't have time to get a good angle woh.... anyway, hope Teacher Roze liked the little surprise yesterday morning.

Also, thanks to Teacher Maeve (Greg's ex-Shichida teacher and she's a great MayDay fan) again for providing me with lots of information on MayDay albums. Teacher Roze likes one of the MayDay songs and originally I thought of getting her that CD (with that song) as a birthday gift. Luckily I checked with Teacher Roze and found out that she has that CD already. Then I thought I could get her other MayDay albums, but I couldn't quite appreciate those fast beat songs (don't mean to offend you Teacher Maeve... I think I am too old for those songs but I do believe their songs are nice). Anyway, I decided not to get any albums because I doubt Teacher Roze is a true MayDay fan. Eventually, after much thought, I got her something else with a little poem on it. Yanti taught Greg how to say Happy Birthday to Teacher Roze in Malay but ended up Greg preferred to say "Selamat Hari Raya"..aiyo, so I didn't dare to ask Greg to say it to Teacher Roze just in case he said it wrongly.. anyway, Greg was quite upset about me getting such a small cake for his teacher and he came to "confront" me yesterday evening..

Greg: Mummy, why is there only one little cake for Teacher Roze?

ME: It's Teacher Roze's birthday, so that cake is for her. Teacher Roze cannot finish the whole cake if we get that.

Greg: But I don't have.

ME: It's not your birthday Greggie.

Greg: But I want to eat the cake...

ME: I'll get you one next time ok..

Greg: Teacher Roze also never share the cake with me..

ME: I told you the cake is for Teacher Roze, not for you. It's not your birthday..

Greg: But Teacher Roze never eat the cake..

ME: Maybe Teacher Roze eats it later..

Greg: I never see..

I guess he must be eyeing the cake the whole day yesterday... poor fellow. I think I shall go get him one later.. hmmm...

Still Can't Let Go..

One relative of mine sms-ed me to say that she read my blog (especially those on my parents) and she cried. I felt sad instantly. I felt sad because it triggered my sad memories. Even now when I attempt to read my older posts, tears start welling up in my eyes again. It has been five months since Mum has left. I may have moved on with my life superficially, but deep down inside me, there's still this strong streak of sadness. It has never been easy for me to let things go.. I am probably just waiting for time to heal my emotions. Anyway, I just want to apologize to those who have been upsetted by my blog or if my entries have made you cry. I really didn't mean it.

A few days ago, I had a mid 50s female patient who saw me in my clinic. I just thought that she's one of those who are so fortunate. She has a perfect family (including both her elderly parents, husband and three grown up sons) and her life has been smooth sailing until her mother-in-law died sometime mid this year. It's the first time she experienced the loss of a loved one and the first time she saw a dead body. I know it's not possible but how nice if everyone experiences losses only at a later stage of their life. Or maybe it doesn't make any difference. I don't know. On the other end, I have a friend (about the same age as I) who has had lost her father-in-law, mother and mother-in-law within this year. The deaths of her in-laws were sudden. I also wonder how she and her husband cope.. well, I believe there are worse cases in this world.

I am not trying to compare here, but I believe everyone has their own lives to lead and our lives are so different from one another. Though I miss my parents terribly (sometimes I even deceived myself that they went on a very long trip to somewhere. How silly right?), I try not to engage in self-pity and hopefully, yes hopefully one day I could move on "fully" with my life.. Honestly speaking, I just can't help but to envy people at my age who still have both parents/ at least a parent with them.. well, I am just not one of the fortunate ones I guess.

Weekend Hotel Stay

KengYong had a free one night stay offer at Ritz Carlton Hotel Singapore and we decided to use it this weekend. We thought we had better used it before our second boy decides to make his appearance into this world. On Saturday morning, we were busy packing our luggage and even for a night stay at the hotel, we had to lug so many things there. Of course, most of them belong to Gregory. I really cannot imagine how many luggages we have to bring along with us if we were to travel overseas with two boys for more than two days in future! Below is a picture of Gregory enthusiastically pulling the big luggage bag out of the house.. he has packed his stuffed toy dog and giraffe into the little orange haversack he's carrying. It's a must that he bring them along...otherwise, he would not be able to sleep well.

We arrived at the hotel at about 12+pm. The ambience there was grand and nice. We were given apple juice/ strawberry iced tea on arrival, and free flow of cookies. The room was also quite big and comfortable. Greg was so excited that he couldn't nap so we brought him down for a swim.













After his swim, he took a nap while KengYong and I decided to shop around Marina Square. Our helper kept an eye on Greg while we went shopping but Greg napped for no more than an hour that afternoon. Yanti called us to inform that Greg has woken up. I guess he's too excited about the stay in the hotel. Anyway, to keep him entertained before we had our dinner, we walked around the Millenia Walk and Marina Square. Greg went into a shop and I was showing him a big black scarf. He said if the scarf were to be put around his head, he would look like Teacher Salimah (one of the teachers in his childcare who wears tudung). Yanti laughed and without hesitation, she folded the scarf and placed it on Greg's head. I quickly dished out my camera and took a photo...haha.. he looked quite girlish with the "tudung" on, and he kept saying that he's "teacher salimah"... I wonder how Teacher Salimah would feel if she knows about it..

We met Rina for dinner at Imperial, Marina Square before we headed to the little play area at Kiddy Palace, so as to keep little Regine and Gregory occupied. Below on the left is the picture of Rina enjoying her food, taken by Gregory. Photo of Greg and Regine on a swing is on the right.

It was indeed a tiring Saturday for me. I was so exhausted by 9pm but Greg was still so full of energy despite the fact that he only napped for less than an hour that afternoon. Anyway, I woke up at about 8am on Sunday whilst KengYong and Greg were still snoring away. I decided to use the hotel's bathtub to have a relaxing morning bath. See picture below: I filled up the tub with water and the bath salt (provided by the hotel).

I had a quick shower at the shower area, and as I made my way to the bathtub, suddenly someone opened the toilet door (cannot be locked) and said, "Mummy, what are you doing?"... aiya... there went my relaxing morning bath! *sobsob* Still, I jumped into the water, and soaked myself for a while before I decided to change into my clothes. How I wish he could sleep longer.. always waking up at the wrong time!

Asked Greg how he felt about the trip, he said "I am so tired. Even dogdog and giraffe are tired". I asked him how he knew his stuffed toys were tired... and well, he showed me a photo he took (see below).. hmmm..
Well, it is indeed a tiring weekend for Greg, KengYong and I though it was just a one night hotel stay in Singapore. However, it's certainly a weekend different from the ones we usually have. =)

I'm Back!

Some of you thought I have "popped" because I had no entries for the past few days... well, I am still around, and my little baby is still swimming happily within me. I had not been able to blog for the past few days because I was attending a Schema Therapy Course at GrandCopthorne Hotel during the day and I was so exhausted by evening that I didn't have much energy to do anything else but to laze on my bed. I had wanted to attend the course back in 1999 when it was conducted in Australia, but I was a poor postgraduate student then. I had to give the course a miss because I had difficulties with my daily expenses when I was doing my masters there and I didn't think it was nice to ask my father to transfer more money into my account. Heehee, I am glad that I am still able to attend it after so many years... =)

By the way, if you know me well enough, you know that I usually sms friends and relatives quite frequently... just to find out how they are. I have a friend whom I met when I was in Australia back in 1998. He was my Secondary school friend's younger brother and during that time when I left for Brisbane to do my Masters, his sister contacted me and requested that I kept an eye on him. He's my little sister's age, and even till now I can still recall those times he cycled down to my house to study/ chat after school. Well, we were constantly in contact when we returned to Singapore in 2000, and he was doing really well in his work and love life. He was in this long distant relationship with a Thai girl, and they planned to get married late last year. My dad passed away in June last year. He called to apologize that he was unable to attend the wake because he was getting married at the end of the year, and that he couldn't invite me for his wedding. Well, I was fine with that and I could understand where he was coming from. Neither would I want to bring any ill luck to him. Nevertheless, we drifted apart after that. I had many issues to deal with myself since Dad's passing (e.g., my abortion, Mum's unwell etc etc) and he was probably busy preparing for his wedding. Mum passed away in June this year and he knew it through his sister. He came with his sister to the wake. I asked him about his married life but I was shocked and upset when he told me his wife passed away last year in the car accident when he was driving in Thailand. Life was so unpredictable.. I still remember him feeling so happy and excited about his wedding, and never little would I expect that such an unfortunate thing would happen to him. He did go through a lot of pain and suffering but I believe his family would always be there for him. I didn't know why but I suddenly felt that I needed to sms him yesternight, just to see how he is in general. He replied in his sms that yesterday was his wife's first death anniversary. I felt so sorry. Also I didn't know it's his wife's death anniversary yesterday. I sincerely hope that he could stand up strong again one day.

It's indeed one great loss one could experience in life and it's something not easy to grapple with. I don't know if I were him I could be as strong as him to be able to move on with my life. Somehow his life story has reminded me that it's very important to cherish what one has, and not lament on what one doesn't have. Try not to make comparisons to create stress and distress for self and if possible, be contented with self and life.. no one and no life is perfect..