Maidless Me!

I have gone "maidless" for two weeks. I am still alive and kicking but feeling somewhat exhausted. It's indeed not easy to juggle housework with very young kids. I hardly have had any rest, day or night. Hence, there hasn't been much chance for me to do any updates on my blog. What a shame! So many thoughts and emotions I had but I couldn't pen them down right on the spot. Right now I have just finished most of the housework and since Gareth is napping, I thought I should quickly log in to update my blog. Hmmm... I shall start off with Gareth first..

Gareth is now 5 months old. He's now grabbing almost anything that he could get hold of. When he sees a toy he likes and even if Greg is playing with it, he would flip onto his tummy very quickly and snatch it from Greg. There was once I went Kiddy Palace with Gareth in the sling. I wasn't aware that he grabbed a tube of fruit pastilles at the counter when I was making payment for those other things I bought! Another thing about Gareth is that he simply adores and idolizes Greg. Even when Greg treats him badly at times (e.g., throwing soft balls at his face). Gareth would giggle and laugh over small things that Greg does, even when it's not funny.

Greg has lost quite a bit of weight. Now weighing about 13.5kg. He has become very choosy with food and refusing foods that he didn't want to eat. At first I thought he had hfmd because of his food refusal and he could go without food for two full days! Anyway, now he's starting to eat again, but would eat those things that he likes. Greg loves Gareth and he helps me with Gareth at times (e.g., talking and playing with Gareth, singing Gareth songs, throwing diapers), but afterall he's a kid and he likes attention too. When we focused too much on Gareth, Greg would do some things to hint to us that he's neglected. For instance, when I was commenting on Gareth's cap (used to be Greg's), Greg snatched it from Gareth and put it on his head despite the fact that it's too small for him (see picture above).

Besides the usual sibling "fights", Greg still very much want to be a big brother. There was once I was about to feed Gareth his cereal,

GREG: Mummy, Gareth wants me to feed him. You can rest first.

ME: Huh? How did you know Gareth wants you to feed him?

GREG: I asked him just now..

ME: But Didi cannot even talk! How did you know he wants you to feed him? Also, you are too young to feed Didi..

GREG: I am a big boy already Mummy. I can feed him! Just now I asked him and he said "mmmm", so I think Didi tells me he wants me feed him.

ME: ???.. well, ok. 1 mouth can?

Greg nodded. I did let him feed Gareth 1 mouth. Greg's happy and Gareth seemed excited to take that one feed from Gareth! =) Gota go. Gareth's awake!

Have To Learn To Keep My Cool!

Suddenly I kinda pity my current maid. I don't know why but I have been snapping at her of late. Of course over things that she did wrong. For instance, I asked her help me play with Gareth for a while this morning, and before she left the room, she knocked Gareth's head against the door! Arrrgh!

I realized that I seemed to be screaming at her the whole day. It's no good for her and myself I guess. I get angry with her easily maybe because I have already planned to send her back. Or maybe because I am still upset over the incidents that happened on the first two days she started work at my place. Otherwise, she does housework robotically fine. I know she isn't an easy maid. Neither is she submissive and timid. So I was wrong in my judgement when I first saw her. Yup! Never judge a book by its cover. She's now pretty careful in her movements at home and if I were to scold her, she would talk back at times still. I guess she may not be suitable in my household, she may do well in other households (e.g., those angmos who allow their maids to do things their way and to talk back).

Yesterday I got maid to play with Greg at Fidgets when I had to breastfeed Gareth. After we left the place,

Greg: Mummy, JieJie never sleep is it?

Mummy: You mean JieJie never sleep last night?

Greg: Ya. I think so. Just now when JieJie play with me at the playground, she says she's tired and she doesn't want to play anymore.

Mummy: JieJie told you she's tired and doesn't want to play?

Greg nodded.

Mummy: JieJie last night slept even earlier than you. And even more than Mummy. Not possible for her to have not enough sleep.

Greg: Ohhh... then why is she so tired?

Mummy: I don't know. Maybe she doesn't like the playground.

Greg: I like the playground you know Mummy. Maybe we come back next time with Daddy and JooYi. Just leave JieJie at home..

So I guess Greg doesn't seem to like Maid at all. However, when KengYong and I were around, she seemed to be better in playing with Greg (e.g., fixing train tracks, building lego etc) now. Maybe she's just pretending. I don't know. Anyway, we are just waiting for more biodata from our agency before we choose our next replacement maid. Hmmm..maybe it's better to go maidless..so frustrating and if this goes on, I think I will age very fast. =(

Fidgets!

One good thing about being a full-time Stay-At-Home-Mum is that I could bring my boys to explore fun places on weekdays when these places aren't that crowded. We went to a newly opened indoor playground at Turf City (#04-05) called Fidgets! It's opened daily at 9am and we arrived there at 9am after parking our car at Carpark B. The place is quite easy to find, and there were only a few angmo taitais with their young children during our 3 hours there.

In their big playground, they have several slides. Two covered ones, one metal one that allows one to slide into the ball pool and another two long slides which resemble those at big splash. Greg had great fun there, but I thought the long slides are pretty dangerous because they are quite steep and the speed is super fast when one slides down. If the kid loses his/ her balance from the sitting position, he/she could get some abrasions. This happened to Greg when he lost his balance once. Greg also almost had a fall when he was "scaling up" some squares fast to get to the top. Luckily I was there to hold onto him, otherwise he may fall right to the bottom where there was only a small cushion mat. Hence, if you are going there with your young kid, please supervise him/ her closely when your kids are climbing up. It'd also be good if he/ she could wear long sleeves and pants to protect his/ her elbows and knees. Parents may like to dress the same way to reduce unnecessary abrasions at the playground.kekeke.

Besides the big playground, they have two smaller playgrounds - one is for infants and the other is for kids below 4 years of age. There was also an area where the children could read books and another small play area where the kids could ride on some vehicles. I have also checked out their cafeteria - nothing fantastic. I ordered a regular cup of hot chocolate that cost me $5.60 (so expensive!) and Greg ate a slice of chocolate cake ($6.90!). Their menu consists of mainly cakes, muffins and beverages.

Overall, my verdict of this place is "ok lah! Can go if not so crowded!" I just thought the place can be quite dangerous especially when there are many bigger kids around. But well, Greg's verdict is "Mummy, I want to come back again!". Besides the climbing and sliding that he loves, I know he likes the ball pool where he could aim and throw the balls into a little hole, and then there's a machine that brings these balls back into the ball pool. Cool isn't it?

What Would You Do?

New maid arrived at my house on 08 Apr evening. She appeared timid and not sociable at first sight but I am quite ok with such qualities. I briefed her on her duties and allowed her to sleep at about 930pm that night. She woke up at 630am the following morning.On the first evening, she attempted to open door to someone standing at the door. I stopped her, indicating to her the dangers of letting strangers into the house. However, on 09 Apr afternoon, I heard someone press the doorbell. I was changing Gareth's soiled diaper after he poo-ed, and when I stepped out of my bedroom, I was horrified to see two strangers smiling at me and standing in my dining room. Maid didn't inform me that she had opened door and when I confronted her, she argued that these two persons claimed themselves to be people checking on the aircon. I got very upset with her because she didn't seem apologetic at first and she didn't think that she was in the wrong.

On her second night, she went to bed on her own accord at 9pm. I was out with Greg for a while, whereas Gareth was asleep and KengYong on the phone. KengYong said maid didn't ask him if she could sleep early and he didn't even know the maid has gone to bed already.Anyway, I woke maid up. She could spell out those duties (e.g., ensuring there's enough hot water in flask, throw rubbish etc) that she needs to fulfill before she sleeps and when I questioned her if she did all that, she could simply reply not yet. Arrrghhhh! I never expect her to be so daring on the second day..

I got quite upset with her "no big no small" attitude too. For instance, she would choose to wear my slippers even though her shoes were beside mine! Or after drinking her water, she prefers to put her cup (unwashed) beside mine! Last but not least, after washing her utensils, she would place them above ours (though I gave her a proper place to put hers) and letting the water drip down. I am so so angry.

Neither did she seem to have experiences with babies and young kids (as stated in her biodata). She freaked out when Gareth regurgitated his milk and she seemed to find it a chore playing with Greg.Greg told me he didn't like her.

Well, apart from all these, she has her strengths. She could understand English generally better than most Indo maids and she learns things fast. She did change somewhat after the first few days and she seemed more tamed now. However, I have this feeling that her change may be a temporary one. Her true colours may reappear after her loan is cleared. I am not sure. Sigh.. I am now in a dilemma if I should simply change for another one. She's now trying hard to do things right, and being more involved in playing with my two boys.

If you were I, what would you do? Would you change for a new helper immediately? Or would you observe her for another couple of weeks? On what basis would you change her? I do feel pretty insecure with her at my house because I don't know what she would do when there's no one at home. I do not even feel safe to leave my two boys in her care alone for 5 minutes with me out of the house. Sigh!

Well, she may be on her toes now. Just now I got her to keep an eye on Greg while I put Gareth to sleep. Greg, as usual, would play quite crazily. He was throwing pillows on the floor, jumping here and there etc. I went out to peep.. maid went "zerk zerk" and giving Greg some angry look (as if he's giving her extra work to do) but when she saw me, she quickly said "GorGor, don't be so naughty ok?" in a very caring tone. Ei year..I think she can be quite angelic when I am around... I really dare not imagine what would happen if KengYong and I were not present. Hmmm... or am I worrying too much over nothing??..

You Know How To Change?

I have been using my TTSH email address to log into my blog but now I am no longer there. Anyone knows how I could change my username (or email address) for the blog? Can anyone help me? I am quite an IT dummy.

Just So Tired

I have been feeling pretty exhausted and down of late. Things just didn't seem to be going very smoothly for me. Somehow I know Mum's trying ways to let me know that she's still around and she'd be with me spiritually. Greg spotted Mum one day while I was driving, and Greg told me he ever saw Mum visiting my house one day. I don't know how true his words and sightings were but I take comfort in that Mum's with me.

We went to Mum's house on QingMing to do our prayers. I was the first to arrive, dragging my two boys along on my own. I was slinging Gareth with his pillow while holding Greg's hand to walk to Mum's house. Somehow I couldn't find Gareth's pillow when we arrived at her house and I thought I could have left it in the car or dropped it on our way to Mum's house. Raymond arrived next and I asked if he saw Gareth's pillow on his way. He said no. He helped me keep an eye on Greg and I ran down with Gareth to look for the pillow. It wasn't in the car so I decided to take the same path which I took earlier to walk up to Mum's house. Interestingly, I couldn't find it till I arrived at Mum's doorstep. It's just right at the doorstep! Neither did Raymond nor I see such a big thing on the floor! My goodness! The floor outside Mum's house is pretty bare and clean with nothing at all. Amazing isn't it? How could I miss it when I left the house to look for the pillow. It's just lying right in front of the gate!... well, I choose to believe that either Mum or Dad is telling me that they are still around.

I have a bad day today. Not only is the maid driving me up the wall, Greg's still not eating proper foods for the past one week. Paediatrician said he's perfectly fine and has no medical problems at all. I have tried all sorts of methods (e.g., using positive reinforcements/ rewards, time out, coaxing him and even limiting his milk intake to maximum 1 litre as instructed by the doctor) but to no avail. Today, I went down really hard on him. I hit his buttocks with my bare hands so hard that now my fingers sore. He made me prepare some food and in the end he told me he didn't want it because he wanted something else!! I was so so mad. Anyway, I was also thinking of stopping him from his Gain IQ till he starts his solids again. I have also stopped his junkfood intake (e.g., choc, sweets) and he starts choosing what he wants to put in his mouth and what he doesn't want. Neither did he want Pediasure.Sigh. He could really make me boil and upset..I do feel very very tired. I guess I am not suitable to be a full time stay at home mother.

Quick Update

I have been so so busy for the past few weeks that I didn't have time to update my blog at all. Maid suddenly dropped me a bomb on 24 Mar when we were having lunch at Centrepoint that her dad wanted her to go home for good after her elder sister (Romsiyah) gets married. She even gave me a deadline and told me that she has to be home by 18Apr! She's not even with me for a year though she has cleared her loan already. I was quite taken aback because upon questioning about her intention to leave, she said KengYong scolded her on 23 MAr and threatened to send her home! Apparently on 23 Mar, Greg doodled on the leather carseat when we were out and maid did nothing to stop Greg or to tell us (we were sitting in front!). KengYong got so angry and after scolding Greg, he scolded the maid but she said she didn't see!?!Anyway, I decided that I couldn't keep this maid for long because she acted very pathetic and lethargic after telling me that she wanted to go home. I felt very cheated because it was only later that I realized that she had it all planned. She requested to buy some new clothes and hairclips weeks before and then even went to the dentist to have her teeth done and well-polished (though dentist said her 'toothache' didn't seem that bad). Well, it doesn't pay well to treat her so well I thought. Quite upset because after she left, Greg was very much affected for at least a week. Besides having to juggle Greg's emotions and the two boys (in fact three, including KengYong), I had to do housework. Not easy especially when KengYong went on a business trip the whole of last week and Greg came down with some digestive problem during mid-week. Come to think of it, I really wonder how I managed the whole household last week. But well, I survived. New maid just arrived last night and yup, I have to start from scratch when it comes to training her up. I do feel quite frustrated at times because I thought she's pretty slow in her work, and she couldn't quite engage in activities with my two boys. Maybe I should give her some time to adjust, and perhaps I shouldn't judge her too early.

Okie. An update. Gareth is now 4 months old. Just started him on cereals (for fun only) though he's still fully breastfed. He's a darling, and he loves Greg a lot. Greg is getting more difficult to manage. He verbally challenges me at times, and would find ways to press my buttons. I could see that Greg has made some cognitive progress - he's indeed pretty creative in building ships, buildings, cars, trains etc using lego blocks. He has also started drawing nice stick figures, beautiful sun etc. I thought he's a lot more artistic than I! Above are some recent pictures of my two boys.. cute hor?

As for KengYong, he's still the same. He is quite busy with work and always has to travel. I went through a bit of rough patch about two weeks ago when my ex-boss accidentally/ deliberately (I don't know!) sms-ed me a nasty note. Quite upset when I received it and it took me a while to really put those words behind me. I didn't know she could be so unsympathetic and nasty towards me. Well, life has to move on.

My neighbour has also just given birth to a baby girl! I am so happy for her. I could smell the aroma of those confinement food that she's taking. Her dad (who's also my dad's childhood friend) drops by everyday to bring her fresh food from the wet market for her confinement lady to cook. Apparently her confinement lady came out late but my neighbour was lucky. Her mum stood in and looked after her, her newborn and now she's helping my neighbour take care of her 2 year old daughter so that she could do her confinement in peace. She's so so lucky.. *envy envy*. She may be leading a fortunate life but she may not see it that way.. well, I may not be that lucky but I think I need to count my blessings too. There may be some things people envy that I have and they don't possess. I guess I need to tell myself that I am also (or was) lucky in that at least I ever had very good and loving parents..