It hasn't been easy managing two kids on my own. It gets pretty tough on me during those times when Greg doesn't want Yanti at all and KengYong isn't around. Undeniably, I lost control of my temper at times (especially with Greg's whining and crying) and I would give Greg a dressing down. I felt really upset after scolding him because I could see that he was emotionally affected. I did try my very best to spend as much time with him as I could but Greg wanted more. He wanted the same as before, when Gareth wasn't around. I could sense the relationship between Greg and I have drifted apart slowly. I felt quite hurt when he ran to hug Yanti (instead of I) when we fetched him from childcare over the last few days. Well, perhaps he felt hurt and rejected with all my scoldings too. I think I have forgotten to give him the positive attention when he's good and I kept jumping onto him when he did something to get on my nerves. I think I have indeed neglected Greg somewhat. Why did I say that? Some of his friends were born around his birthdate(or even later than him) and their parents have already planned for their birthday parties whereas I have been sitting on it. After receiving the smses on these birthday parties from other parents, I decided that I have to do something for my little boy on his birthday. And I must do something to bring him and I close again..
I went to pick Greg up from childcare yesterday and Teacher Roze was sharing with me about Greg's behaviour at childcare. Apparently, there's a new boy in his class and Greg wasn't happy about his favourite teacher spending lots of time with him. Greg was said to throw tantrums in school because of that. I felt quite sad when I first learnt about it. Sad because if I were Greg, not only do I feel rejected at home, I also have to go through the same thing at school. I tried talking to Greg about his situation at school but to no avail. Well, I guess I will change the home situation first instead since it's something I have more control over. I probably have to train Yanti to look after Gareth more, and perhaps I could bring Greg out alone when Gareth attends the infant care. Sigh.. it's indeed not easy to juggle two kids well on my own, but I am still game to give it another go. Wish me luck!
2 comments:
aiyo, must quickly train Yanti to feed and bathe Gareth.
Ouh Dear!! i feel for you! im juz glad that you could overcome it~
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